Tuesday, August 9, 2011
GBE2 #12--Saying 'I Do'
Interlocking rings. Marriage. Weddings.
Lots of girls dream of that huge special day. The traditional big wedding. Flowing white gowns, hundred of people, bridesmaids...groomsmen...the whole enchilada.
I am so not that girl. Unless you're talking about an actual enchilada. Yeah, I'd be all over that in a heartbeat.
Fancy weddings....not so much.
I really don't see the point in spending all that money for what ultimately is a really big party. Spending all that money to show off to people you haven't seen in years or might not even know. (To paraphrase a close friend in regards to her wedding: "she and my mom were cubicle neighbors at work for almost thirty years...so I HAD to invite her to my wedding" I just find that silly.)
Costofwedding.com says that the average price of a wedding is $24, 066! Most of which, if we're following traditional protocol, is the responsibility of the bride's parents. Seriously. If my mom had 24-grand to pay for a wedding...I would just want her to give me the money. I could find much better uses for the money than a big party. A party you might want to repeat at some point down the road when your first marriage ends and you've met the second (third, fourth...) person of your dreams.
I've been married twice. I thought my first wedding was a small fun affair. It fit who I was at that point in my life and it fit my then husband as well. It fit who we were as a couple. At that point in time, I would have said that I'd had the perfect wedding. The whole thing cost under $600.
But my second wedding was even more perfect.
May 20, 2005. A lovely spring day. The sun was shining brightly through our balcony window at our house. We had seven family members in attendance.
Nathan, Addy, and Bear were there too. They were 8, 3, and 2, respectively.
Jeff wore jeans, a dress shirt, and tie. I wore a beautiful sheer lavender dress.
Nathan was the best man. Addy was the flower girl.
Two year old Bear carried the rings on a satin pillow adorned by ribbons and bows (hand made by my best friend for the occasion).
"I do's" were said by the balcony window, in front of the people we cared about most.
We did it together--as a family.
It was all about love and not about putting on a show and looking good for the neighbors.
That IS the point of getting married.....right?
It would be really awesome if I could have my fairy tale doughnut shop wedding....someday. But if I don't, I'll be just fine.
I've already had the wedding of my dreams.