Spies of the Empire State: The Legend of Elizabeth Grace GBE2 #60

Beth, our fearless leader (of the GBE2 group) and all-around favorite word nerd, went on sabbatical for the month of July.  She said she needed to step away from the internet to gain some much needed clarity and perspective.  She said that she wanted to spend more time with her family and pursue some of her non-internet related interests.

Well...I am here to tell you that her story is HOGWASH!!

I'm sure that when Beth made her plans for the month of July, she wasn't expecting to find herself here in upstate New York.  I'm also sure that, even though she can clearly see on my Facebook profile that I live a mere fifteen miles south of the Empire State's capital city, she wasn't expecting to see me.

Or should I say...she wasn't expecting ME to see HER. 

It was a rare moment for me.  I was alone and I had a spare ten bucks in my pocket!  That never actually happens almost never happens.  I was feeling a little sluggish and decided that a refreshing caffeinated refreshment was just what I needed.

I spied a cute coffee shop and said to myself:  Self, no one knows you have this extra ten bucks.  What better way to spend it than to buy an overpriced, over-caloried coffee drink!  You can sit and people watch for a few minutes before you head back to town and into the insanity of summer vacation.

My inner monologue is notoriously talented at getting me to do it's bidding.

I bought my coffee and sat at a table facing the street.  The hustle and bustle of downtown Albany proved to be perfect entertainment.  I was truly enjoying this moment that was all mine.

A chime above the door alerted me that someone had entered the coffee shop.  Being the nosy gal that I am, I looked up to see who had entered and I could NOT believe my eyes.  I knew that Beth was taking July off from online activities, but boy oh boy...when August rolled around I was sure going to tell her about her New York look-alike!!  

That's when I heard a man say "Beth, I'm so glad that you made it here safely."  Oh my goodness!!  This woman's name was Beth too??!!  I was certain that Beth would find this story very amusing.  

I turned around just in time to see her give a warm, friend like hug to a man who...wait for it...looked just like Johnny Depp!!  I rubbed my eyes.  I did that thing where you try to look at people without actually appearing like you are looking.  They sat down at a table near mine, which made eavesdropping that much easier.

I had to text Jeff and let him know that I'd be late getting home.  I HAD to investigate this.  He would totally understand.

"Johnny, I'm so glad that you could find time out of your busy schedule to come give me my next assignment personally."

 

"Oh Beth, it's nothing really.  Movie companies are using Albany frequently for filming because it's cheaper than New York City.  It's natural that I could be here."

 

What??  I could not believe my ears.  Well, the part about Albany being in the movies is true...but...what kind of assignment was Johnny Freaking Depp giving Elizabeth Grace?  To say that I was intrigued was an understatement.

He pulled a thick manila envelope out the bag at his feet and slid it across the table.  Beth opened it and out plopped what appeared to be a passport and other forms of identification.  I couldn't see what they said but the items looked authentic enough to me.

Beth grinned across the table at Johnny and took a sip of her coffee.  "How long have we been at this?  It feels like forever.  No one has ever suspected a thing."

Johnny chuckled.  "It has been forever, Bethie.  Or at least since I was doing Jump Street.  The assignment is a simple one...just some basic surveillance...with photos and a report, of course"

Beth, looked over the documents and pondered everything for a moment.  "It won't take too long, will it?  The Hubs and I have plans for the rest of July...a road trip to nowhere."

"It'll just be a week or so.  You're going to Italy this time.  Do you think you can handle it?"

Beth downed her coffee and looked at Johnny with a mischievous gleam in her eye.  She gathered up her identification and stuffed it into her oversized purse.

"Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy..."  she said.

 And she was out the door.

Makeup Monster (30 Days of Truth--Day 4)

(Day 4 asks What is part of your daily routine that you enjoy?)

I am nuts for makeup. 

A little over three years ago, I mentioned to my husband that I was jealous of girls who had makeup skills.  I told him that someday I'd like to learn how to apply makeup--eyeshadow in particular--without looking like a toddler playing with her mother's makeup.  Back then, I wore just enough makeup to make me look human.  Anything beyond the most basic eyeliner, mascara and foundation was completely foreign to me.

My husband suggested checking the internet for advice and instruction.  That idea hadn't ever occurred to me.  After just a few clicks, I found myself bombarded with information.

And a monster was born.

With a lot of practice...and I do mean A LOT...I became pretty darn good at it.  There is always room for growth and improvement but, overall, I'm quite pleased with what I have learned to do during  what has become my obsession hobby.

Just about everyday....regardless of what my plans are...I usually do some sort of makeup.  Even if my plans are just running to the grocery store or going to work. 

This is my ME time.  An hour (depending on what I have to do that day) that is totally dedicated to what I want to do.

Some people relax with a glass of wine and a good book.

I grab a soda or a coffee, crank the tunes, and paint my face.

This is a shameless plug of my makeup blog...click here :-)

Releasing My Inner Golden Girl (GBE2 #50 Topic: The Stranger)

There's a story from my younger days that my kids absolutely LOVE.

Since it involves a stranger, it fits for this week's prompt.  So sit back and relax because I'm about to get my Sophia Petrillo on....

Picture it.  Albany.  1992.

I was walking home with my very best friend.  I can't remember if we were walking home from school or from something else entirely...I suppose it doesn't matter...but we were about two or three blocks away from our houses. 

Up the street, we spied an older man.  He appeared ancient to me at the time but in reality he was probably in his late fifties or early sixties.  He was short (shorter than I was anyway) and stout.  His gray hair was short and he had the classic 'horseshoe' bald spot.  His big round face was covered with several days worth of five o'clock shadow.

My kids would have called him a hobo. 

I have no idea if he was actually homeless but he was quite disheveled and we thought it would be best if we gave this guy plenty of room on the street. 

Did I mention that he was wearing a trenchcoat? 

As we approached the spot where our paths would cross, he spoke to us.

Holding his trenchcoat closed he growled to us "Hey there girlies....get a load of this!"
And he whipped open the trenchcoat with all the oomph and enthusiasm of your garden variety flasher.

And he flashed us.

Fully clothed.